Sleep Training 

We all know it has to be done. But who would ever in their right mind want to do it! It’s soul destroying. It’s hard. It’s heart breaking. It’s time consuming. But you gotta do it if you ever want to sleep again. It’s better for your child and it’s better for everyone’s general health!

I tried ALL the different ways. Believe me, I’ve had 3 boys who all at some stage were early risers, terrible napper’s and did not know how to go to sleep by themselves. Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t their fault. It was mine. I gave them bad habits, I didn’t really know it at the time, but I did. And trying to fix it was awful.

This is what I have tried at some stage over the past few years..

  • Pick up/put down method. (Never worked for me. Made them more hysterical)
  • Just put them down and leave the room (only ever worked on Ollie temporarily)
  • Cry it out. (I have never really done this. I did try a few times but just didn’t have the heart for it)
  • Walk in/settle/walk out (once settled you walk out and wait for 5 mins. If you have to go back in, when you come out you wait 10 mins, next time wait for 15 mins. You get the idea..Never worked for me)
  • Gradual retreat  (only thing that worked for me! It’s the longest method but very effective) HORAY!

James my first born started waking early at 5 months old. At 5am. Every morning! Tried all the above training methods but in the end, it was the gradual retreat thing I had to do. Where you put him down to go to sleep and step away but stay in the room. After every 3 days or so your step back would be closer to the door. Until a million years later you are eventually out the door. Now it did work to be fair. But it was exhausting. And I was pregnant!

Caelan my second born ended up the same but I have no recollection of how I fixed it! That will tell you how tired I most certainly was. There is only 16 months between them! He wasn’t as bad a sleeper as James as I recall. I was adamant I wouldn’t make the same mistakes with him as I did on james. (Lets take a moment to laugh at that!)

And now Ollie. He’s 9 months old and I really feel it’s only now we are getting somewhere. Again I’ve done all the above but it was the gradual thing I’ve ended up doing and it seems to be working. Slowly. His wake ups are better. He can settle himself without me and his naps are better. We still have bad days but that’s life isn’t it? 

My one bit of advice for anyone who is pregnant or maybe on their first baby is this..now this is solid gold info here…go write it down if you have to..I wish I did this from the VERY BEGINNING! And it’s very simple…just put the baby down for all naps and bedtime DROWSY BUT AWAKE. 

For the love of God, just do that and baby won’t know any difference and will always happily go to sleep like that! Don’t do what I did. Probably what a lot of you did too! (I know I’m not alone on this!) And save yourself the heartache, the tears and the sleep deprivison.

Anyone who is doing sleep training at the moment, I wish you the very best! Keep with it. Have patience. Persevere and you will be so happy when you come out the end of it. And so will your baby!!

Fingers crossed. 

Love 

Melissa 

Warrior Woman Mammy

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Did I say I was tired? Eh sleep is for wimps..

I have no idea what’s going on with my almost 8 month old. Like seriously! Why won’t he sleep? I thought it was teething and those 2 teeth came down so what’s up now? He’s just over an illness so it’s not that either. Maybe it’s a growth spurt. Maybe it’s developmental. Who knows! Hes the cutest, smiliest and happiest baby during the day. I’m baffled.

He was awake screaming from 12pm to 2am last night. Awake at 5! Again screaming. I did everything. As any mother would..to try and get him back to sleep. After his feed at 6.30am he ended up in the bed with me so I could get some sleep.

This is only day 2 of the kids being back to school and I’m already exhausted. Any stay at home parent will understand my despair. Because when you have a bad night, having a bad day usually follows suit. You are tired and cranky and irritable. The kids drive you mad. Baby gets to have naps, but you can’t. (That’s so not fair!)

It can be very depressing to wake up after very little sleep knowing that you still have to be a parent, an adult, and try to function normally. Someone still has to clean the house and cook the dinner. But we just get on with it, don’t we. We have to. 

We live in the hope that tomorrow will be a better day. During all the screaming last night I was praying. For strength and for God to give me the wisdom to know what to do. To help my lil guy. To settle him. And for us both to get some sleep.

I’m hoping it’s a phase and it will pass soon. But I’d like to think he just loves his mammy so much all he wants is to be in my arms. And that’s fine with me! My poor back says otherwise but that can just shut up! 

You’d think on my third child I’d have it all figured out! This whole sleep thing. But unfortunately I don’t have all the answers. I’m winging it most of the time! But I do know that somehow, someday, it will get easier. 

Am hoping it will be sooner rather than later. But until then, I’m just gonna have to grin and bear it until I figure it out. IF I ever figure it out! So to all of you in the same boat as me…you most certainly are not alone! 

Love

Melissa